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Change Your Brain…

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Change your brain…is that possible? For someone with OCD most days that seems impossible. But maybe it’s not…

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again (and again and again. I have to keep reminding myself.)…God’s timing is perfect. And He knows exactly what we need when we need it. I’ve been adjusting my diet over the last couple years to try to be healthier and heal both my mind and body. This journey led me to the GAPS diet. Which has been extremely helpful. After 9 months I have seen a lot of progress. But I’m still not where I want/need to be. Then a few weeks ago as I was digging through the clutter on my desk I spotted a book that has been on my shelf for well over a year now. And it’s not even mine! Sorry, Sara. I will give it back. I promise 🙂  My SIL loaned me Change Your Brain Change Your Life a long time ago (thanks so much!!). It’s been on my to-read list ever since. But life got busy with pregnancy, kids, etc. And I forgot about it. But for some reason a few weeks ago I spotted it, pulled it off the shelf and started to flip through it (not something I would normally take the time to do, but God knows better).

I don’t often have time to read. I have several books sitting on my desk that I started reading when I was pregnant…that I haven’t touched since then. But it just so happens that when we have overnight guests (like we did over Christmas) I bike in the mornings in the office instead of the basement, which means no tv. I can only read. Normally that would mean flip through a magazine. But instead I started reading this book. I skipped right to the chapter on worry and obsessiveness (in other words OCD). It was like reading a chapter about my life. The idea behind this book is that when you have a mental illness it is actually a physical issue in your brain…that can be fixed. If your brain was scanned you could see strange activity in certain areas, correlating to certain mental illnesses/brain functions. OCD stems from problems with the cingulate system. Problems with the cingulate system cause:

worrying
holding on to hurts from the past
getting stuck on thoughts (obsessions)
getting stuck on behaviors (compulsions)
oppositional behavior
argumentativeness
uncooperativeness (tendency to say no automatically)
addictive behaviors (alcohol, drugs, eating disorders)
chronic pain
cognitive inflexibility
OCD
eating disorders
road rage

Well…that pretty much sums it up 😛  That’s me…and I don’t like it one bit! My brain makes me negative, argumentative, obsessive, quick to say no. No wonder growing up my dad often said the common phrase “Mary, Mary quite contrary.” It was true. My behavior is made up of all kinds of stuff that I don’t like and that is not the kind of example I want to set for my kids. I want to be a Godly woman that is loving and kind and patient. I want to be a good wife and mother and not let my messed up brain control me. So I want to do something about it. I want to change my brain. This book gives quite a few techniques for overcoming these issues. And I intend to try some of them (I have already done some via my years of therapy). I hope to do more posts about some of the specific techniques later. Sadly this book jumps right to medications as a solution. I don’t intend to do that (although some days it is tempting to think that a pill could magically take away the obsessive thoughts that I can’t get out of my head). Thankfully it also talks about diet. I’m glad this author sees that as a critical part of healing. Wouldn’t you know it…he says that a high protein, low carb diet (like GAPS tends to be unless you are very careful and intentional) can actually make cingulate problems worse! It can lower levels of brain serotonin. He suggests foods high in carbohydrates (to increase serotonin levels via l-tryptophan…calming effect) or foods rich in tryptophan (to increase cerebral serotonin) such as chicken, turkey, salmon, beef, peanut butter, eggs, green peas, potatoes and milk. After reading about magnesium and grains and already debating about adding them back into my diet this was the information I needed to decide to change directions with my diet. I truly believe GAPS has helped heal my gut. But it may be having some of the opposite effects on my OCD it seems. So now that I have started healing my gut I want to heal my brain. This will require dedication on my part to balance the two. I still need gut healing foods, but also some properly prepared grains/carbs. Thankfully I already eat a lot of the food that is naturally high in tryptophan. And I will be adding more dairy to my diet (including raw milk). This book does not say if this is more a “quick fix” when you are anxious/a way to keep things in check or a way to truly heal. I guess I’ll have to experiment and see.

The author also talks about supplements. The main one is l-tryptophan (a naturally occurring amino acid found in milk, meat and eggs). He also mention B vitamins…which is something I’ve been debating about taking for a long time anyway. So I am planning to look into a good B vitamin complex.

Finally he mentions exercise as an effective treatment. I could have told you that 🙂  That’s why I exercise daily. It is my main way to relax and forget about anxieties and worries. It doesn’t have to be intense exercise. Just some simple biking or jogging.

So that is the main information I wanted to share and the direction I’m headed. But I also wanted to mention a few other things. First, this is actually not the first time I’ve read from this book. Way back when I started seeing my psychologist about 5 1/2 years ago she printed out a section of this book for me to read. It was the section on anxiety and the basil ganglia part of the brain (at that time I didn’t know I had OCD and had not shared any of that stuff with her). So I started following some of the advice from this book many years ago. And I know that it helps.

I also wanted to talk a little about Rebecca and her behavior. It’s no secret we’ve been struggling lately with her behavior. Lots of tantrums, refusal to obey, refusal to answer questions, struggles eating, all kinds of stuff. I’m sure some of it is just typical 3 year old behavior. Especially a 3 year old with a baby brother that gets lots of attention. But I often wonder if there is more to it than that. I know that mental disorders are genetic (my mom has struggled with anxiety and depression for years, and I believe my dad has some OCD though he’s never been diagnosed). So it would make sense that Rebecca could have some of the same tendencies. As I was reading about worry and obsessiveness I came across a section about ODD…oppositional defiant disorder. This is what is says:

“ODD is considered a behavioral disorder of children…who are negative, hostile, defiant and contrary. They tend to be argumentative, are easily annoyed, and lose their temper often, especially when they do not get their way. These children are chronically uncooperative. They tend to say no even when saying yes is clearly in their own best interest…Most children will comply [with a parent’s request] seven to eight times out of ten without a problem. For most ODD children [this usually only happens] three or fewer; for many of them it is zero.”

It certainly would explain a lot of Rebecca’s behavior. I found this part very interesting: “These children cannot shift their attention. They get stuck on No, No way, You can’t make me do it. They often have ‘cingulate parents,’ and many of them have a family history of OCD and other cingulate problems.” (meaning me :P)  “One of the most interesting findings among [ODD children] was that mothers or fathers who had obsessive thoughts, compulsive behaviors, or inflexible personality styles tended to have children with ODD.” “A child’s inability to shift attention causes his behavior to appear oppositional. It is also possible that the parent’s rigid style causes the child to react in an oppositional way as a way to gain independence and autonomy.” “[Some] oppositional children get worse (“more stuck”) under pressure or when they are pushed to comply with certain requests.” This would explain why once Rebecca starts to get defiant and you ask her over to do something (and you get more impatient/stressed) she just gets worse, the tantrums start, she cries harder and she can’t get “unstuck” from the cycle until you give her something calming (her milk cup) and let her be for a minute. She often even says “I can’t stop. I need something to settle down.” I guess I need to start listening to her.

So, what do we do about it? Well, I can start with diet for her just like for me. Stick to nourishing foods with a good balance of carbs and protein (I’m so glad she drinks so much raw milk!). It is also very helpful to give her options and distractions. This will help her get “unstuck”…change her thoughts. If she is having a meltdown about getting on her shoes, instead of getting impatient with her I should forget about the shoes for a moment and ask her what doll she wants to bring to the store. Then go back to the shoes after she has cleared her mind a bit. And that is also why I mentioned in my goals post about giving her options that require more than a yes or no answer. Since she is likely to automatically say no that doesn’t work. I need her to have choices that make her think and give a true response. This will change her thought process and get her away from any obsessive thoughts. This could also be why Rebecca can’t drop a topic. If she has a question she will ask you over and over and over until you answer. And sometimes you even have to answer multiple times. She can’t get it out of her head.

I’ll be honest, I have only read the part of the book that talks about OCD/worry. I want to read the whole book at some point since I know I have other mental issues that need to be addressed. But this is my starting point since the OCD is my biggest struggle. God knew exactly what I needed to know right now in order to continue on my healing journey and to help with Rebecca. I have a lot of changes to make in the way I interact with her.

So this is my starting point. It will be experimental. I’ll see how things go with the diet and supplements. If adding grains makes my gut way worse than I’ll switch back to GAPS and just be careful about my carb intake. For now this is where I’m at…right where God wants me to be. And I feel a peace about it. I hope that it helps both Rebecca and myself…and the whole family. I want to be a loving Christian wife and mother that brings joy to her family. I want to heal my brain and change my life.

Do you struggle with OCD or any other mental illnesses? I’d love to hear from anyone that has found things that work.

5 comments

  1. Sara says:

    Very interesting. And how awesome about the timing for you and fitting into God’s plan.

    Kevin definitely fits into every category you listed, too. I wonder if kids can have ODD with just one parent and not so much with the other. Carson can act very much like you describe the way Rebecca acts when he’s interacting with Kevin… or with your mom. But he’s completely different with me usually. Danny came over for a couple of hours a couple of weeks ago when just Carson and I were home on one of my flex Fridays. He commented that he couldn’t believe how different Carson is for me than he is for your mom and for Kevin. I knew I wasn’t crazy and there actually was a huge difference! 🙂 Kevin always refuses to see the differences. Anyway, it’s very interesting.

    I’m glad you have some clarity on your path forward at the moment, Mary!

    And btw, no worries at all about the book. I still have a book of yours that I have started to read numerous times and for some reason or another never get very far. Keep the book for awhile, till you’re done with it. I won’t have the time anytime in the near future to even think about the book. 🙂

  2. Christie says:

    Hi Mary, have loved reading your blog and appreciate your honesty as you trial everything, yes God does bring accross the right ppl at the right time.

    If you areinterested bks written by biochemists which outline the specific foods to support the parasymathetic or sympathetic nervous system a good place to start is:

    Nutrition and your mind by Geaorge Watson and Nutrition Solution by Harold Crystal or The Mood Cure by Julia Ross who uses animo acid therepy.

    To raise seratonin use lacto ferm food, tryptophan or 5HTP supps or fat and sweet potato or pumpkin at night time. Supps to raise are Evening Prim oil and mag, zinc, b6 combo. You may be low in GABBA also to raise eat liver and take valarian and passionflower.

    Use PH saliva testing strips to test individual foods if you are not certain on the affect they are having.

    If you feel you still need more support have hormonal testing for progesterone and pregnenolone as both increase gabba and seratonin.

    Hope this helps!

    Christie

  3. The Voogts says:

    @Sara – Thanks, Sara. That is interesting about Carson. Rebecca acts the same with both Justin and myself…but we have similar personalities. I bet it’s possible to act differently with different parents/personalities.

    @Christie – Thanks so much for all of the info!! I really appreciate it. The Mood Cure has been on my to-read list for quite some time. Maybe I’ll have to see if the library has it soon. I may have to look into some supplements. I have heard some of the ones you mentioned. I do eat fermented foods every day and have started a mag supplement. But I’m guessing there are others that I am deficient in. I still have a lot to learn. Thanks again for all of the suggestions. I’m glad you are enjoying the blog.

  4. I was searching for a Dutch Apple pie recipe and came across your blog. When I saw ODD listed on the left side, I HAD to read it!

    My 17 year old son was diagnosed with ODD when he was four. I found that he manifested the opposition part only toward me and his father, but not his teachers. We never did figure that out. I did find out, as we learned through the years, that we had to discontinue any foods with red dye 40, and any juices that were not 100% juice, especially staying away from the red ones and orange juice. He learned to understand that he couldn’t have chocolate after 6 pm, because it made it very difficult for him to settle at night. He used to say that if he ate chocolate at night, he would “bounce off the walls”. Very funny coming from a young child.
    He gradually manifested ADHD along with the ODD, and I had to learn to deal with those symptoms. Now that he is 17, the psychiatrist has changed his diagnosis to bi-polar. Apparently, docs hesitate to diagnose children under 16 with bi-polar (basically for insurance purposes).
    I have found the best thing for him even as young as six was finding an amazing counselor (psychologist). They have the ability to test, through games, what the child is suffering through, and help them understand how to deal with the emotions that come for no known reason. Patrick has a terrific counselor, and he is able to understand exactly what his diagnosis is, and how to think through his feelings.
    I pray that Rebecca doesn’t end up like Patrick, but there are ways to head it off when you start young.

  5. Mary Voogt says:

    Deanne – Thanks for all of your comments! I’m glad you stuck around to do some reading. Rebecca now (at age 4 1/2) has not been officially diagnosed, but after a half hour with my psychologist we’re pretty sure she has ADHD.

    My Dr. has mentioned the food dye…but we don’t really eat anything food dye (you’ll see that this is a real/natural food blog). She doesn’t drink any juice that isn’t 100%…and even that is a rare treat. I don’t think she eats chocolate often either. I’m glad you found some things that work for your son. It can be so challenging. I think at some point we will start experimenting with her diet to see if things like gluten or grains make a difference.

    At some point I’m sure she will see my psychologist more. Thankfully my Dr. specialized in ADD and her own son has it. So she really understands.

    I have heard about the blood type diet. I’ve looked at a little a few times. I too am blood type A. I’ll have to look at it again. I also found that eating for your metabolic type can be very helpful. Congrats on the weight loss!! That’s pretty amazing.

    I hope stick around. And I hope you try the dutch apple pie recipe!! It’s a good one.

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